​Dear First Gen,

​I told you in my last post about my journey to healing. But some of you may be saying, “Am I allowed to heal? Am I allowed to feel hurt?”

This is something I struggled with for years. And my fellow first gens, I believe you and I have every right to feel hurt, but also every right to seek #healing.

But just as we've battled other #hardships, there will always be others who tell us we have no right to feel hurt.

Some say that if we do not like it here, we should go home. How is that so if we were born here or escaped to #America for refuge? America is our home. We are home!

For more than 30 years I have been living under a veil and recently it was removed from my eyes. My intimate circle is nothing like what I have seen in the news recently. When I hosted a launch party for my blog, the friends who came to support me came from different backgrounds, and I am proud to call them my #circleofinfluence.

When I hear harsh words from people that seek to diminish the value and beauty of multiple races and ethnicities to only leverage their own, it shocks me because when I look at my first gen community, we are so much more than our complexions. What is more alarming is that the hurt and pain we feel from these images and statements are often silenced. We are not given the right to feel hurt, to work through the pain, or to heal. We are told, “If you don't like it, go home.”

Below is a video on my authentic, vulnerable perspective on the topic of #immigrants in America. First gens, this is our home. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise. #celebratefirstgen

​This month's featured First Gen has embraced her first year of living abroad. Read about her journey in becoming the first in her family to live in another country and miles away from her family.
​
1. What is your name?
My name is Bridget Lotoft.
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2. What is your current occupation?
I am currently working as a Paralegal Specialist in Japan. My previous work experience involves advocacy work within law enforcement and volunteer work with survivors of domestic abuse and sexual assault.

3. What is your education background?
I have a Bachelor of Arts in Criminology with a concentration in Women Studies and Sociology minor. Also, I earned a Master of Science in Criminal Justice.

4. What is your family background?
My mom and dad are both from South Georgia. My dad joined the Navy and as a result, I moved a lot. My parents divorced and we settled in Glen Burnie, Maryland. I grew up in single-parent home where my mother working overnight while I was in high school was normal. Seeing her work hard to make sure we had our basic needs met motivated me to want to help others in similar situations and further my education. I come from a family that has a lot of secrets and from that, it's pretty divisive. So I am working on recreating my own family traditions. Among my siblings, I am the first to finish school, but I have a few cousins who completed college as well.

5. Do you have any "firsts" recognized by your family?
I am the first of my family to move out of the country. ​

This month’s featured First Gen is also outstanding, has a knack for simplicity, and is admirably humble. He pursued his graduate education out-of-state and impressed his classmates by being valedictorian of his graduating class. (I thought I would mention it since he would want to keep it quiet.)
 
 
1. What is your name? Charlie Mileski
2. What is your current occupation? Attorney
3. What makes you a first-generation graduate/professional? I am the first person in my immediate family to attend graduate school and to become an attorney. 
4. What was your proudest moment as a first generation? And why? My proudest moment as a first generation was my graduation from law school. Law school was stressful and full of challenges. However, I powered through. My entire family attended my graduation, most traveling cross-country. Seeing my parents’ and brothers’ faces and the tears in their eyes as I received high honors and graduated made it all worthwhile.
5. What advice would you give to a first-generation student, graduate, or professional? Always be prepared and always plan for what may happen in the future. As long as you have a set plan and set goals, you will have a personal guide to success.
6. What is your favorite quote? And why? "Kid, you’ll move mountains! Today is your day! Your mountain is waiting. So get on your way!"  [Theodor Seuss Geisel (a.k.a. Dr. Seuss)] This is an amazing quote because there will be mountains to overcome and you'll always need a reminder that you can overcome them!


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